I have no idea where to go from here. Its happening all over again. I feel terrible. Is it just me? Am i the one who is the problem? I know that i have been very controlling about your whereabouts and wants all of your time to myself. I admit i have been selfish. That was the way how i showed my love for you. I know that it is wrong now because you do have the intention to leave me now. You said it last night. You dont want to lose me. But then your actions.. made me feel that this is the last time that we are going to be a couple together. It really pains me to see that we are going through things this way. I know you need your time, i know you need your space. I know that i have given you unnecessary stress over alot of things that i made a big fuss about. But isn't our love strong enough to overcome everything? I really cannot, i really can't lose you. You have become such a big part of my life now. You made me dream, you made me want to have goals. You aspire me to climb the ladder from where i am right now. I know it was slow for me to do so, but i am doing it aren't i?
From the way you say things for the past few weeks, i have already sensed that something was wrong and tried to strike a conversation with you. Little did i expect that this would be the outcome. I know that you are tired being with me because you feel that you have been doing more, tolerating me,and letting me throw my temper/tantrum as i wanted. I really really apologise on my part for being like that, and i promise i would really change for you and for us. I really need you to believe in us that we can work things out again. I really need you to do so. I can't even describe my feelings right now. Im afraid, scared, worried that you will really leave me for good. It never really strike me hard enough that you will REALLY leave me because of all my nonsense. All i am asking from you now is to give me another chance to prove myself to you. I know that i have been saying this over and over again and have never done so. but please, give me one last chance.. i have never really begged you for something so badly. all i am asking from you now is just for you to be by my side again.. i really cant afford to lose you. i really can't.. I really can't explain how hurt and painful i am right now. I know it is silly to hurt myself to ease my pain, but i.. We both have given up alot in this relationship. But is this the end? I don't want us to end things. We still have a bright future ahead of us. Please give me another chance to prove myself. I am really begging you for it. This is the last time. Please.. ...